Tag Archives: how to improve self-esteem

Goal Setting

Goal setting is a powerful process which is vital for focus and time management. Without setting our goals correctly it is impossible to concentrate on a plan of action to achieve them.

“Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible” ~ Tony Robbins

You may be a young man in your early twenties or a woman in her late forties. You may be setting goals for the day or for tomorrow or the next week. This doesn’t matter. What matters is getting into the habit of setting worthwhile goals and then accomplishing them.

Within you, never forget this, are success instincts, and if you can activate them, you will have within you a chain reaction of reaching-out-to-achieve-goals mechanism. This predisposition of a human being toward the successful achievement of his goals, is called “success mechanism

“All who have accomplished great things have had a great aim, have fixed their gaze on a goal which was high, one which sometimes seemed impossible.” ~ Orison Swett Marden

Sense of direction, understanding, charity, courage, esteem, self-confidence, self- acceptance, these are the ingredients of your success mechanism. SUCCESS is the nailing down of the goals which you want for yourself.

  • Sense of direction: You must set goals which make sense to you; you must know where you are going. A brand- new, smooth-flowing car is of no use if there is no highway.
  • Understanding: Many of our goals will centre around other people, and we must understand how they think, what they want, how we interact with them. We must be able to communicate with them and to understand the communication they send out to us, no matter how subtle or devious, because of their fear.
  • Charity: Setting goals purposefully, understanding and relating well to people—you are on your way to success. But you must have the courage to do, the courage to take a plunge off the diving board, or your success mechanism is incomplete. Because there are no sure things in life, no matter how well laid your plans, you can never foresee the consequences with certainty. When you have the courage to take action, then your goals in life are more than passing fancies, then they mean something to you in your world.
  • Esteem: You must appreciate your own worth as a human being, and that of others. Unless you feel esteem for yourself, your goals are of little value, and even if you achieve them the victory will be hollow. At the heart of your being must be your feeling that there is good in yourself, if you don’t feel this, your success may impress others, but you will know better, they will be superficial, phony successes. You must learn to see yourself as a child of GOD, as a creation of HIS. You must see others, also, as children of GOD, as purposeful, as valuable.
  • Self-confidence: This is similar to, but different from, esteem. Self-confidence is the product of successes; we have confidence in ourselves when we remember that we succeeded in the past. It goes without saying that we all have failures in life as well as successes, but we can develop self-confidence that triggers our success mechanism. If we concentrate our thinking on our success, seeing ourselves at our best time and again. Not that we should deny our failures; this would be unrealistic. We should use our blunders as guides to learning, then forget about them. Then we should bring into our mind images of our triumphs to cement our feelings of confidence in ourselves.
  • Self-acceptance: You will not always feel confident; sometimes your stomach will be tied up in knots and perspiration will break out all over your face. Your nervousness will be visible to other people; they may look at you curiously, or, you may do something rash, injuring your own interests or rudely stepping on someone else’s toes. Your imperfections many; everyone is most imperfect, really— and you must learn to accept this. You must understand that your blunders are not your total personality; they are just a part of you, and this is a part which you must accept to be successful. Otherwise you will dedicate your days to an avalanche of self-castigation which will leave you miserable, head bowed, a failure at almost anything you try. You must not look to others for acceptance; this is something you must give yourself.

These are the basic ingredients of success mechanism. They will help you toward the purposeful execution of your goals. They are success-oriented; they point to goal-attainment, to satisfaction in living. A purposeful living today means steering your mind to productive goals.

 “By recording your dreams and goals on paper, you set in motion the process of becoming the person you most want to be. Put your future in good hands — your own.” ~ Mark Victor Hansen


Becoming a better you

Becoming a better you requires willingness and open-mindedness for change and growth. One thing about life is that it is never static. Change is inevitable, it happens all the time. If you ever want to become that person you ever wish to be then you have to keep pace with changes. On my person, I have a favourite phrase: “Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become”. It has made me a better person; not perfect but every day I have something to be proud of.

Many are the days we are driven by abstract situations and we do not want to accept reality or the changes that we are expected to make. In that we can never become a better person. Yes, there are so many hurdles to being good but losing the ‘self’ in you is detrimental. I do not want you to lead a bad path (I have seen many people get lost for good) and that is why I share a week’s formula to become a better you;

Be a servant

How often do you serve others? There is a lot of gratification in giving service to others. Be there for those close to you or those who need you. It does not matter your position but be a servant.

“Service to humanity is the act of making sacrifices for people we don’t necessarily know or have any close connection with, simply by virtue of our spiritual connection to them as part of one universal spiritual family. It is an act that, when replicated by many, results in material progress and the advancement of human civilization. Additionally, the act of service to humanity has the power to unite the hearts of all mankind, as individuals and societies develop their spiritual capacities.”

List your values

You are more valuable than you think. You have priceless values and every decision or goal you make should resonate with those values. Your 2016 resolutions should underline your values and it will be a year of change that you will live to remember.

“No one can determine your value except you. Stop on self-limiting beliefs. Embrace your self-worth”

Know that you have a purpose

You are not just wandering all over the world waiting for you date with death. You have a purpose and finding it will make your life worth living for. It doesn’t matter what age you are. It doesn’t matter who you are, where you’re from, or what you do. As long as you wish to live a more meaningful and conscious life, a life purpose is for you. For example you could   inspire and unleash creativity in some individual, help people discover their worth, break their barriers, and realize their hopes and dreams, or educate and enable people to achieve their best health and hence, live a happier and healthier life. Find it and you will never regret a single day.

“The purpose of life is not to be happy. It is to be useful, to be honourable, to be compassionate, to have it make some difference that you have lived and lived well” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson

Appreciate your strengths

You may not be the best you wish to be but you have strengths that nobody else has. No matter how insignificant you think your strengths are; someone else wishes they were you.

“Each and every individual in this world is unique and different from others in his/her own way. Each one of us possesses distinct talents and our strengths and weaknesses vary from others. Once you have identified your strengths, take a look at your current role and assess whether or not you are playing to your strengths. If not, assess whether it would be possible for you to adapt the focus of your work to make more of your strengths.”

Grasp your passions

Deep inside, you really know what you want to become. Nobody knows you better than you do and that is why you should keep your passions alive. Do not be discouraged by failures; they are just there to test you mettle. Be steadfast with what you want and that is what you will get.

“There is no passion to be found playing small – in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living”  ― Nelson Mandela

You have needs, know them

Many people live and die without ever knowing their needs. It is stressing to live a long life and deep inside you do not know what your needs are. If you want security or freedom then these are your foremost needs. Those called heroes and fathers of our nations knew their needs, changed the world and that is why we remember them centuries after they died.

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world” ― Anne Frank

Live from within not without

There are those people who know much about others and the world but they do not know themselves. If you want to be better, start by knowing your inner self. Take time with nature, be alone and go for soul searching.

“At the centre of your being you have the answer; you know who you are and you know what you want.” ― Lao Tzu

You do not have to be the president of the most powerful nation in the world to be better. You can do it in your small ways. Change your life and see what the real value within you is. Try today to know yourself and what is worth your life.

“Never believe that a few caring people can’t change the world. For, indeed, that’s all who ever have” ― Margaret Mead


Positive Thinking

Positive thinking often starts with self-talk. Self-talk is the endless stream of unspoken thoughts that run through our head. These automatic thoughts can be positive or negative. Some of our self-talk comes from logic and reason. Other self-talk may arise from misconceptions that we create because of lack of information.

If the thoughts that run through our head are mostly negative, our outlook on life is more likely pessimistic. If our thoughts are mostly positive, we’re likely an optimist, someone who practices positive thinking.

Positive thinking isn’t about expecting the best happens every time, but accepting that whatever happens is the best for that moment. Positive thinking generates positive feelings and attracts positive life experiences. Have you ever heard this saying, “He who controls his mind, controls his life”. We cannot control what others do or what happens around us, but we can control our own mind. And when we control our mind, we will be in control of our thoughts, our emotions, our beliefs, our attitude, our actions, the word we say, and the images that run around our head.

Now that we understand how powerful our mind could be in relation to the pattern of our thoughts and our outlook on life, why not train our mind to embrace the power of positive thinking and a good result.

It has been argued in medical circles that up to 90% of disease has psychological origins. It’s a fact that our psychological outlook can have a dramatic effect on our overall health and longevity. Positive thinking can be a useful, powerful tool to get through difficult situations that life can bring and it can also be used to help improve the overall quality of one’s life. Having a positive outlook enables us to cope better with stressful situations, which reduces the harmful health effects of stress on our body. Those who believe in the power of positive thinking, such as motivational speakers, life coaches, and self-help gurus, claim that taking an optimistic approach to life has shown great benefits. Some of the benefits that believers of positive thinking claim to experience are more stability during stress, physical and psychological well-being, recovery from illness, and healthier relationships.

The topic of positive thinking has been studied by many people. Here are some of their thoughts. The law of expectations says: “Everything you expect with full will come true.” In other words, we do not necessarily get what we want, but get what we expect. If people develop the habit of positive expectations, they will be amazed at the influence it will have on them and the people around.

The law of gravity says: “You are a living magnet; you always attract people, ideas and circumstances that harmonize with your main ideas“. One of the most important habits in this regard, is a habit to fill the consciousness of a positive picture of your life and the world.

The law of correspondence says: “Your outer world is an accurate reflection of your inner world.” It means that people get what they think most of the time.

The law of attraction says: “I attract to my life whatever I give my attention, energy and focus to, whether positive or negative” this means that whatever comes into our life, we are attracting it into our life by the power of our mind, both positive and negative experiences. It’s attracted to us by the images we’re holding in our mind, because pictures or images are thoughts!

Positive thinking doesn’t mean that we keep our head in the sand and ignore life’s less pleasant situations. Positive thinking just means that we approach unpleasantness in a more positive and productive way. We think the best is going to happen, not the worst.

It is simple to learn of how to change negative thinking into positive thinking. But it needs time and practice, as we are creating a new habit after all. Positive thinking is like exercising a muscle. Only it gives us a mental workout. The more we use it, the better we will become at it.

Here are some tips that we can use to think and behave in a more positive and optimistic way:

  • Identify areas to change. If we want to get more involved in the habit of positive thinking, we have to identify the areas of our life that we usually think more negatively about. Whether it is our work, a relationship or our finances. We can focus on each area one at the time and approach it in a more positive way.
  • Check ourselves. We have to stop, check and evaluate our thoughts regularly during the day. If we realize that our thoughts tend to become negative, we have to find a way to change their direction into a positive way.
  • Be open to humour. It’s okay to back off from the intensity of our life from time to time, and see the humour in life’s situations. We have to learn to laugh more often, especially during hard times.
  • Surround ourselves with positive people. People have a huge impact on our lives. There are people who can suck out our happiness, energy and maybe some of our tangible resources. It is important to be with people who can enrich our lives, and inspire us to be a better person. “Surround yourself with people who make you happy. People who make you laugh, who help you when you’re in need. People who genuinely care. They are the ones worth keeping in your life. Everyone else is just passing through.” – Karl Marx
  • Practice positive self-talk. Most of us usually are in constant mental chatter. We talk to ourselves all day long and, unfortunately, this self talk is frequently negative. Often it is tainted with guilt about our past or anxiety about our future. This negativity can destroy any seed of hope that we may otherwise have in striving for our dreams. We must not say anything to ourselves that we wouldn’t say to anyone else. Be gentle and encouraging with ourselves and use positive affirmation whenever we say something negative, whether in the mind or verbally. Affirmations are positive statements of a desired outcome or goal. They are usually short, believable and focused. By repeating them over and over again, we build inroads into our subconscious mind, opening up the possibility of a new state of thoughts.

“Positive thinking is more than just a state of mind, it is the way we embrace life“


Trust Yourself

Trust yourself. You know more than you think you do.  ― Benjamin Spock

Trusting ourselves means trusting our intuition or our gut feelings. Intuition is a great self-help tool as it is with us at all time and can tell us what we really want or don’t want in our life and what we need to be successful. After all no one knows the real us better than ourselves.

Unfortunately we ignore our intuition most of times and let our rational mind to take over. When making a decision. How many times do you ask people for their opinion? How many times a day do you second guess yourself? We all have been doubting ourselves most of times, thinking that we are not good enough. That is because we don’t trust our inner voice and instead we depend on others. In other word we tell ourselves that our opinion don’t matter and others must know better than us. The truth is that we do know something and probably know more than we think we know. But by thinking that we don’t know anything keeps us from making the right decision which our intuitive mind is telling us. And we let ourselves to be dependent on other people.

It’s time that we learn how to trust ourselves. Here are a few simple steps which can help you to build trust in yourself:

  • Be-friend yourself. The most important relationship in our lives is the relationship with ourselves. If we don’t know ourselves, are not connected and emotionally available to ourselves, we cannot be connected and emotionally available for others either. By knowing ourselves better we become more focussed on our internal processes. We have to constantly ask ourselves questions, like: “What am I feeling? What am I thinking?” “I wonder why that’s bothering me? And this process builds an inner strength and plants the seed of trust.
  • Take action. We gain trust in others when they stick to the promises they have made and have delivered them. Has ever someone let you down? Made a promise and broken it? How did it feel? Pretty horrible I suspect. What about the other way around?  Have you ever broken a promise to someone else? We generally try with all our power to follow through our word, to do as we have promised we will. Promises are serious matters and by not sticking to them we create strong feelings when they are made and broken. We place a lot of value on being honest and having personal integrity. Now I have another question to ask: Have you ever made a promise to yourself which you didn’t follow it through and broke it? I think most of us have, even more than once or twice. The point is, if we have a friend who constantly made promises and let us down, what would we think of them? What value would we place on their promises?  And how long would we tolerate their behaviour? When we break the promises that we have made to ourselves, we send ourselves a powerful message that we are not trustworthy. And we also go against our values around being honest and acting with integrity. By learning to be accountable to ourselves we start to trust ourselves, and with each and every commitment we keep to ourselves, we build our self-esteem and faith in our ability to deliver. Making a promise to do something that is within our limit but at the same time, leading us towards our goal, is the best way to build trust.
  • Be tough, but just. Each and every one of us make mistakes during our lives. There might be times when we break our promises to ourselves, but the important thing is to acknowledge it and find a solution for it. The best ways I found to make me keeping my promises are: To make one promise per day and stick to it.  To be realistic in my daily commitment, not to let anything get in the way, To make my promise clear and specific, To write down my promise and keep it somewhere visible, To keep track of my daily success on a chart somewhere I can see regularly, and reward myself for keeping my promises for a week.

Life is about trusting yourself and your feelings, taking chances, finding happiness and learning from your mistakes. Don’t be so afraid of making mistakes as I believe that life has a way of working out. So trust your best judgment, stick to your decision, follow through, and let the cards fall where they may.

“Listen to your own voice, your own soul, too many people listen to the noise of the world, instead of themselves.” ~ Leon Brown

 


Give Yourself Permission To Live A Life

Give yourself permission to live a life – Most people around the world have sacrificed their passion or creativity in order to fulfil their responsibilities. So often in our lives we lose touch with our inner selves, with how we feel and what we truly desire in our lives. Then we start asking ourselves questions like:  How will it be when I get to the end of my life? How do I feel about the life I lived? The feeling of anxiety that will come next is just normal. Then we will feel confused because life had felt so good. We were happy, had a successful marriage, beautiful kids, and a job that we reasonably enjoyed. We feel that we had everything and yet something is missing. This missing part keeps us from being happy and completely satisfied with our life.

We have to realize that there is no fairy dust that will make our life what we want it to be or a magic spell that will bring us the feelings that we desire. We have to accept that only we have the control and the power within us to make the choices that will serve us best. We are the ones who have to take the first step and give ourselves permission to apply positive changes to our life and create a new happy and more fulfilling life for ourselves.

Here are top ten shifts in perspective that can help you move your life to the next level. This self-improvement article will assist you in breaking through that missing part to create the life you really want.

  1. Give yourself permission to dream. When was the last time you caught yourself daydreaming and appreciated it? You probably had no problem dreaming, when you were a kid. What happened to your ability to imagine and dream about what you want and who you want to be? How often do you allow yourself to be who you are? To dance when you want to dance? To sing? To say, I love you first?
  2. Stop looking outside yourself for happiness. Look inside. People often believe something outside of themselves will make them happier. The truth is, external elements bring only temporary happiness. Once you have enough money to pay your bills, have lost weight, or have fallen in love, your happiness subsides and you begin looking for the next external element to make you happy. Increase your self-awareness. Get curious about who you are at the core. Cultivate and nurture a relationship with yourself. Learn to love yourself, and you will automatically receive the love and appreciation that you desire from others.
  3. Cover the basics. Take the time to address your personal needs. How can you focus on thriving in your life if you are in survival mode? Set up that meeting with a financial advisor, get your space organized, clean up the details that are wasting your energy.
  4. Embrace your past and move on. Learning to accept your past will help you move forward in your life. Let go of things in your past which are lingering around and are causing you stress. Shift from “why it happened” to what I want to do about it now. Asking “why” is not a very empowering question. Asking what or how I want to proceed can be much more powerful and produce forward movement.
  5. Remember that you are not alone. Life can be very overwhelming sometimes but you have to get yourself into the habit of reading regularly. When was the last time you read a book or an article about self-improvement? Everything you read fills your head with new bits of information, and you never know when it might come in handy. The more knowledge you have, the better-equipped you are to tackle any challenge you’ll ever face. Read more self-improvement articles. They might help you figure about some things that are puzzling you.
  6. Remember gratitude. Count your blessings. Being grateful is a choice, a prevailing attitude that endures and is relatively immune to the gains and losses that flow in and out of our lives. When disaster strikes, gratitude provides a perspective from which we can view life in its entirety and not be overwhelmed by temporary circumstances. Yes, this perspective is hard to achieve, but it is worth the effort. Make a list of what is working right in your life? Set aside a bit of time every day to acknowledge what or who you are grateful for. The more you practice gratitude, the more you attract things into your life to be grateful for.
  7. Follow your passion. You still have your passions though it has been a while since you may have felt it flow. Make a commitment to yourself today to become aware of your passion, follow it and live it completely free as you let go of your fears and worries. It doesn’t make sense to say, “I don’t know what my passion is.” What does make sense is to say, “I haven’t yet cultivated a passion, I should really focus down on a small number of things which can help me to find my deep passion that drives me into a fulfilling career.
  8. Take action and take a risk. All the inspiration in the world is not enough to make you move your life to the next level. It takes inspired action to do that. When you’re taking inspired action, you are in the zone. You are flying along like a high speed engine and everything just flows. You will accomplish more in a relatively short amount of time than you ever realized was possible. You will work harder than ever, but it doesn’t feel like work.
  9. Keep breathing. You probably forget to take deep full breaths. We have all learned to constrict our breathing in response to stress. You can’t stay calm unless you control your breathing. We need oxygen, not only to live but to gain energy and be healthy.
  10. Have fun. Do something that you enjoy. Take a walk at lunch and enjoy the sunshine on your skin. Listen to some soothing music for five minutes (with your eyes closed). Take yourself to an art museum or schedule a whole day out in nature. Give your spouse an extra-long hug and kiss when you see them tonight. Incorporate some fun in your day. It makes life a lot more enjoyable!

Always look over the little details of your life… like a child’s laughter, a friend’s hug, or a stranger’s smile… to love someone and be loved by someone… enjoy them… They may be small, but when you look back in your life, you’ll realize that those are the things that made your life colourful and worth living for.

“Give yourself permission to take action on feeling good and creating positive changes in your life, because you deserve it. We all do!”


Spiritual Awakening

Spiritual awakening comes, when we become aware of our infinite nature. Our planet nowadays is full of issues, sounds, information and challenges that pose on our spiritual senses. Have you ever been desiring a more meaningful life more than an unfulfilling work, or gathering material possessions?  In case that your answer is yes. I have to say that you are not alone, as more and more individuals realize that true and lasting happiness and fulfilment can never be won on the battlefield of material success, no matter how powerful or wealthy one becomes, or how adept one is at surrounding oneself with the “right” people or circumstances

People have become more focused on self-awakening or self-realization these days, as they are more aware that the answer lies within rather than in external things. They have realized that the answer doesn’t lie in obtaining more possessions, expensive cars, beach homes, but an experience full of spiritual insights which makes this life more fulfilling and worth living.

The best decision makers and great motivators throughout the history were the same as we are, irrespective of one main factor: They simply understood just how to pay attention to their inner self. They realized how to relate to their higher level of consciousness and how to stay tuned to their internal voice.

Exactly the same voice that we all have within us at this time, awaiting its calling to be answered by us.

“Even a stone, and more easily a flower or a bird, could show you the way back to God, to the Source, to yourself. When you look at it or hold it and let it be without imposing a word of mental label on it, a sense of awe, of wonder, arises within you. Its essence silently communicates itself to you and reflects your own essence back to you.” / Eckhart Tolle

Every morning as we wake up from sleep, we enter the state of wakefulness, a state of repeated stream of thoughts, which is the characteristic of being wakeful. So what is it that we awaken from when spiritual awakening occurs? We awaken from identification with our thoughts. In the unawakened condition, we are totally identified with and run by our thoughts. We don’t see anything as it is, but by our twisted mental concepts, ideas, judgments, and perception. Our sense of identity gets cut down to a story which we keep repeating to ourselves in our head. And when our life is thus reduced, we can never be happy as we are not ourselves. Whereas In the spiritual awakened state, we realize that there is a depth to our being which we had never been aware of, and that is our conscious. We become more aware of the way of our thinking and we won’t get ruled by our thoughts any longer. A spiritually awakened person no more identifies with the body, while living in the body and performing all functions and activities by the body. He has let go of all sense of ego which is “I”, “Me” and “Mine”. He does not get affected by any emotion since he is filled with love, kindness and compassion for all humanity.

“That is the real spiritual awakening, when something emerges from within you that is deeper than who you thought you were. So, the person is still there, but one could almost say that something more powerful shines through the person.” / Eckhart Tolle

Characteristics of a spiritually awakened person –

  • The Spiritually illumined individual has lost his sense of ego since he identifies with self (divine).
  • He could have all the worldly materials such as wealth, fame, friends, relationship, and enjoy them, however the loss of them doesn’t make him miserable and unhappy.
  • Since he believes that all the worldly possessions are not permanent, he is not afraid of losing them.
  • He never seeks the approval of others or the external force as he believes in the power of self (divine).
  • He doesn’t get affected by any situation which can bring happiness or unhappiness since he has reached the mental state of self-control and the presence of mind.
  • Fear, jealousy, hatred, animosity, or any other negative force has no place in the life of such a spiritually illumined person.
  • He is always very humble and never sees himself as a superior to anyone as he believes that everyone is the same as he is and everybody is equal to him.
  • A spiritually illumined individual is free of all negative thoughts and actions about himself and others because the true nature of self is divine. His every word or action is of a high intellectual or moral level and he inspires others to challenge them.
  • He is totally detached to any material assets, relationship, name, fame, concepts or beliefs.
  • He performs all his duties conscientiously and to his best ability in life but he leaves the outcome of his efforts to GOD, as he believes that the result of his efforts are meant for the welfare of all concerned.
  • The spiritually illumined individual is a one who is absolutely egoless. Love, compassion and kindness oozes out of such a person like water flows out of a fountain! It is unconditional and it is available to all human, animals, birds and plants. He always takes care not to cause any harm to the nature as he believes that learning from nature is one of the best ways to learn humility.
  • Forgiveness is a strong trait of a spiritually illumined person. He lives a life of optional humility and, he can never mistreat or harm anybody.
  • His utmost aim is to grow spiritually all the time instead of pointing out to the flaws and imperfections of others. Such a person doesn’t teach or lecture others but he becomes himself a role model which others strive to follow.
  • He always respect other people’s opinions and beliefs and never imposes his belief on others.
  • He is always a happy being, and he spreads happiness and joy wherever he goes.
  • Since he is content and happy with what he has, so he is free of any greed and desire to possess more than his basic requirements.
  • The spiritually illumined individual doesn’t get angry and if somebody gets angry on him, he won’t retaliate or begrudge that person, but forgive them easily.
  • Such an individual doesn’t look for fault or flaws in others and if anybody criticizes him, he will accept it gracefully.
  •  He never try to control others as he believes in controlling himself.
  • A spiritually awakened person accepts all kind of people, situations and things as he has a great capacity of patience and tolerance.
  • Such an individual has more inner silence and he speaks less but whatever he says is sweet and good.

The single message of those who have realized such potential has always been the same, and basically, it comes down to this: True and lasting happiness and fulfilment are an individual affair and can only be found by going deep within, where one’s true essence is vividly and stunningly revealed as love, and then living into the reality of that awareness.

“You are here to enable the divine purpose of the universe to unfold. That is how important you are.” / Eckhart Tolle


Enlightenment

Enlightenment is the “quiet acceptance of what is.” I believe the truly enlightened beings are those who refuse to allow themselves to be distressed over things that simply are the way they are. “Wayne Dyer“.

Enlightenment is accepting and understanding of things as they are rather than as they appear.

Acceptance is an act of trust. It is then, when we accept our current circumstances and let go of what is not working in our lives or what we don’t like, that universe will guide us to where we need to be, to a more fulfilled and meaningful life.

Acceptance also helps us to deal better with the challenges and obstacles which come our ways in life. It gives us the strength to overcome the negative emotions and helps us to clear our mind, to receive intuitive messages which lead us to take positive action.

I am sure that you have some brilliant ideas, somewhere in the back of your mind that you can’t wait to test them out. All you need is a bit of positive thinking and you will be able to put them into action. Remember that Positive attitude in whatever you do will make things easier, and even enjoyable.

Here are some tips on positive thinking which can help you:

1: Live your life and be true to yourself. Consider creating an authentic future in a passionate way and enjoy every moment of it.

2: devote yourself to create a life which you can love and be proud of, for yourself and the people you love. A life out of love instead of fear.

3:  Believe and accept that each moment of life is precious and you could never have it back when it is gone. Every time you hit an obstacle while doing a task, instead of getting dishearten, why not give it another try and see if it will work, or find another way to make it work. In the end if you are not happy with the outcome, then decide to use that moment to learn from and make the applicable change.

4: Remain constantly in the state of being grateful. Once you become oriented toward looking for things to be grateful for, you will find that you begin to appreciate simple pleasures and things that you previously took for granted. Gratitude should not be just a reaction to getting what you want, but an all-the-time gratitude, the kind where you notice the little things and where you constantly look for the good even in unpleasant situations. Today, start bringing gratitude to your experiences, instead of waiting for a positive experience in order to feel grateful; in this way, you’ll be on your way toward becoming a master of gratitude.

5: Always keep humour at the leading edge of your thought. Laughing at and with yourself when possible.  Laughing makes everything easier, happier and it is such a healthy exercise. Life has so much more to offer. Think of the people who love you. They are the perfect reason why you should always wear a smile on your face.

6: Believe that you are the creator of your desired destination. Nobody is able to take your enthusiastic future from you except yourself. Design your authentic life and don’t allow anybody to ruin or rule your life. You’re the master of your own life.  So instead of subjecting yourself to exactly what you will be bound for, create your own direction by grabbing the initial step with a positive attitude. As long as there’s still breath in your body, there is no end to how much you can accomplish in a lifetime.

7: Increase your self-confidence and knowledge by observing and learning positive things from people around you. You may come across people with different way of thinking in your life, but don’t let other’s negativity affect your vision or stop you from being the best person you can be.

Instead of subjecting yourself to what you will be doomed for, make your path by taking the first step with a positive attitude. And with achieving positive will you can surely enjoy the power of positive thought and having a happier life.

“Education is the kindling of a flame, not the filling of a vessel.” ― Socrates

Happiness

Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony. “ Mahatma Gandhi ”

The most basic and primary duty for each one of us is to develop into a joyous being. To be satisfied is not the final word aspect of existence. It is life’s fundamental part. If we are not happy, what else can we do with our life? Only when we’re pleased, the door of great different opportunities could open to us.

Anything we do, it is simply our inner quality that we are going to spread.  We cannot do anything of tremendous value for our planet until anything of accurate value occurs within us. Thus, if we want to be connected to the world, the first thing we must do is to transform ourselves right into a happy beings.

It doesn’t matter what we do in our life, whether it is business, studying or giving assistance to someone or some cause , we’re doing it because deep down, it gives us satisfaction. Each activity that every individual executes on this globe rises from a desire. We were not unhappy when we were a child, as joy and happiness is a source which resides within each one of us. So all we have to do, is to go for it and take charge of that joy which is residing in us.

Everything in universe is in order. The sun comes wonderfully well up in the sky.  The flowers flourish beautifully, no stars falls along, and the galaxies are functioning perfectly. Today, the whole cosmos is occurring divinely well, but just a negative thought worming up on our brain enables us to believe that today is a poor day.

Suffering occurs basically when most human beings shed perception in regards of what this life is all about. Our emotional process become far larger than the existential procedure, or our petty creation become far more critical compared to GOD’s Creations, to place it bluntly. This is the way to obtain all suffering. We miss the complete sense of what this means to be alive here. An emotion within us or a thought within our mind establishes the nature of the experience right now. And our thought may have nothing to accomplish even with the restricted reality of our lifestyle. The entire creation is happening beautifully well but just one considered emotion can ruin everything.

Anything we consider as “our mind” isn’t ours basically. It is merely society’s empty talk. Everyone and anyone whom we encounter on a daily basis put some idea or information in our head and we truly have no choice about whose idea we accept or don’t accept. These information are advantageous once we learn HOW TO process them and use them. This accumulation of opinions and information that we collect is simply useful for our survival on the planet. It is not something which is related to who we are.

The first thing we need to do when we get up in the morning, is to smile. At whom? No one. Since just the fact that we have woke up is not a small matter. A lot of thousands of people who slept yesterday evening didn’t wake up today. Isn’t it great that we woke up? Look as you woke up, look around you, if there is someone, smile at them. Because this morning, for numerous people, someone precious to them didn’t get up. Then venture out, take a deep breath and look at the bushes. They didn’t die yesterday either.

You may think this is really funny, but you won’t know its reality until someone dear to you doesn’t wake up. So don’t wait until you understand the value of it. Appreciate what you have, be happy that you are alive and everyone who matters to you is still around.

Of course, people who do not have food or the basic needs for living can feel physically miserable and their needs must be addressed. Our duty as a human being is to help them and take care of such people when we encounter them. But most people are unhappy not as a result of what they don’t have. It is because they compare their life to others. You are driving on a motorbike, you see somebody in a Mercedes and you become unhappy. But for someone who is driving a bicycle, your motorbike seems like a limousine.

Life is about learning and appreciating what GOD has created for us on this plant. It is not about twisting and distorting it. When we rely on the external situation to make us joyful and content, we could never feel true happiness.

The quality of our life doesn’t depend on what car we drive, how much money we have in a bank account, or how big our house is, but how content and happy we feel inside.

It is positively time now that we look inside of ourselves and see HOW TO create personal wellbeing. From our own experience of life we can clearly observe that wellbeing will come to us when we change our perception on life. We need to realize, if we are determined by the outside factors to create our happiness and wellbeing. It will never happens, as nothing will be %100 the way we want them to be. When we accept this fact, then we will be able to work on ourselves as an individual to become the person we want to be. And happiness will be our only choice which has been our authentic nature by creation in the first place.

“Sometimes your joy is the source of your smile, but sometimes your smile can be the source of your joy.” Thich Nhat Hanh

Mental Health

Mental health could be described as a state in which every individual realizes his or her own abilities of how to cope with normal stresses of life, of how to be able to work productively, and how he/she is able to make a contribution to his or her community

Your mental health is an amazing part of what makes you as a person. Personal development is a way of life that effects your mind, actions, and how you treat others around you.  It plays a vital role on your over-all wellbeing and the relationships around you.  Often times, we get so caught up in the physical aspects of what’s on the outside and forget to take care of the inside. Exercising our brain consciously and subconsciously is an important factor when improving one’s life and creating a healthy state of mind as we age.  When we are depressed, stressed, tired, and frustrated it effects everything we do as well as the people closest to us.  I remember someone telling me in a depressed state, that she couldn’t even watch television because she didn’t want to watch the living. When I get down, I often think of that comment and it reminds me of a place I don’t ever want to be. Isolating yourself from others could turn into something very dangerous and unfortunately help will only start with one person. YOU! Although there is a laundry list of books and professional help, also recommended, but if this article gives you a jump start to just get you slightly motivated to move forward, then moving an inch is greater than lying still.

Depression and anxiety will use every good power that you have against you. Keep in mind that the most talented individual wouldn’t get anywhere without persistence.  Persistence and determination are the first steps to controlling your thoughts and feelings.  Many medications can trigger depression, make sure to consult with your doctor to see if this has any effects on the way you are feeling.

Studies indicate that the most common reason for depression is the lack of interests and activities. When improving your personal life, interests and activities are vital in mental health, self-esteem and happiness. Although this does not help much when fighting boredom, or other problems but you can best improve your mental health by practicing many of them until you do well.  When we are depressed, it is easy to forget all of the things we liked to do.  Motivation can help us overcome trying something new or remembering exactly what made us happy. Asking friends and family to help motivate me is a tool that I use when I’m in the need of a little push. Reward yourself when accomplishing tasks, such as getting the laundry done before watching your favourite television show.

Negative thinking also plays a major role in depression. The happiest of people experience the same pain, suffering and sorrows, just like a person depressed. To accept troubles gracefully and keeping a positive attitude is where you’ll find how some people cope with things on a different level. Ask yourself, are your expectations realistic?  Accepting a situation for what it is can eliminate your negative feelings.  Taking action for your own negative ways of thinking and turning those thoughts positive means that you are motivating yourself to change.  Tackle what is bothering you, and take a bad situation and turn it into something good.  A little humour helps my situation from time to time, meaning laughter does a great deal for our mind and body. Try not to constantly worry about being happy. Developing interests, activities, friendships and learning how to cope with the emotional pain will conquer your personal problems and further solve your thinking habits.  Doing this will get you on the road of happiness, as long as you put forth the effort.

“The flower that blooms in adversity is the rarest and most beautiful of all.”

Improving Your Personal Life

Improving your personal life is achieved by turning your wants into needs. Throughout our lives, we all have the desire to be all we can be, although some of us ignore this desire. Many times, we may stay in our comfort zone without realizing that we are passing up opportunities to do something that we truly enjoy. Of course, the money may be good, your bills are paid and you find it easy to work with repetition. Yet, are you happy?

When you are ready to improve your personal life, you must turn your wants into needs. I need to be successful. I need to be a great parent. I need that promotion. I need to save my relationship, etc.

How to be your own life coach:

Many of us spend time convincing ourselves that our dreams will never come true. We may feel that our dreams do not amount to anything. Poor self-esteem hinders the quality of life. In addition, you miss being your own coach. You can turn the negative thoughts into positive reflections, which will guide you to improve overall personal life. The next time you feel like turning yourself into a destructive thinker, breath deep and say, I love myself, just the way I am, with all perfections and imperfections. Learn to walk tall and habitually think about what you want to achieve. Set plans, write down your goals, and take action to reach those goals. You may want to learn something simple. Learn how to be a better cook. Stop yelling at the children.

How to take steps in becoming a better you:

Thinking positive is a great start to improving overall personal life. Surrounding yourself around good influences will encourage you to acquire better behaviours. You will learn to practice these new habits daily. Once you conquer your obstacles, you can mark off the list of poor behaviours you have written down.

Tips for personal development and growth:

Learn to say no. For some of us, our natural instincts lead us in the right direction to helping others. Are you sacrificing your needs however, to consistently take care of other people’s needs? Are you taking time out of each day to pamper yourself for fifteen minutes or so? Are you taking actions to stop persistence that spreads yourself too thin?

If you spread yourself too thin, it will lead to sleepless nights, since you will feel anxious and depressed. Do you constantly keep yourself in the centre of drama? If so, do not allow others to drag you down. Try to stay away from situations that drag you down and take you beyond your control. If you are focusing on the wrong items in life, you are not improving overall personal life.

Do you tell yourself that you are not good enough? Do you say you are not strong? Do you feel like you are not enough? Do you feel like you deserve what you get, when what you get causes you sadness?

For some people it is easy to focus on negativity, which causes them ongoing depression. If you are one of those people at interviews, when asked about your qualities, skills, etc., speaks out rambling off your bad qualities, you need to stop now. What you are doing is taking away your opportunities to achieve. Some of us are lost at words when it comes to speaking highly of ourselves. For some people this seems selfish, or boisterous, yet it is not. Learn to become your own best friend and give yourself frequent compliments. Stop focusing on yourself and criticizing your every move, and forget about the past mistakes and focus on your future. Sure, we can say it is easier said than done; yet if you put forth effort, it is easier than you believe. So many times, we do not take full responsibility of our own actions. We rather live a life blaming others for our mistakes or misfortunes. Do not obsess over past mistakes, live in denial, and stop blaming others to see how your life will improve. We all make bad choices in life. This is a part of living. Learn from your mistakes and move ahead. Treat each new experience as a point of learning. Next, we can learn how to wake up to improving overall personal life.

“Those who cannot change their minds cannot change anything.”  George Bernard Shaw