Building self confidence involves encouraging a positive but realistic attitude toward yourself and the world around you and appreciating your worth, while at the same time behaving responsibly towards others.
“Self confidence is the first requisite to great undertakings” Samuel Johnson
The confidence one has in himself, the way he sees himself down deep, is fundamental in his adjustment to himself and the world he lives in. My aim in writing this article is to help you strengthen this self confidence so that you will tackle your life situations healthfully, without allowing prejudice against yourself to eat his way into your mind.
“Self confidence is a learnable skill, like typing or riding a bicycle. You develop it with practice” Brian Tracy
There is a story about the great Michelangelo. Working in a stone quarry in Italy, the great sculptor was overjoyed at the sight of a huge, oblong block of stones. He touched it. Within it he saw the spirit of Moses. After many, many hours of working on the stone, chipping it, shaping it, he brought forth his great work of art, his great creation of Moses and the Ten Commandments.
Now may I ask you to be your own sculptors, your tools compassion and understanding, so that you can see in your mind’s eye the best that is in you, as Michelangelo pictured Moses, so that you can work to make and keep this best image of yourself as a reality. For your self image and how you value yourself is closely linked with your self-esteem and self confidence.
“Don’t be your own worst critic. Be your own best coach. Learn from your mistakes, but encourage yourself to new heights. Each time you fall down, be the first to pick yourself up. Confidence is a habit you can grow. The seeds are the thoughts and beliefs that empower you to take action.”
It is your self confidence, which, more than anything, can guide you to years of dynamic living. If you give yourself acceptance, if you see your success and try to perpetuate them, if you believe in your capability, life will hold no great fears for you, and you will remain in the mainstream of life, doing, feeling, relating, connecting.
“Building self confidence is like building muscle, you start with basic structure and then you build on it”
You can think of confidence as a muscle, then pay attention to all the chances you get to flex it throughout your day. It even starts with how you get out of bed. If you don’t think of yourself as confident, then act “as if” and gradually you’ll find your groove.
Keep in mind that while competence breeds competence, confidence comes first – you have to believe to achieve. Above all, don’t anchor your confidence on external people or things. Flow it from the inside out, starting with your own belief in you.
I offer you the Ten Commandments for a purposeful and creative living: C-O-N-F-I-D-E-N-C-E:
- C: Concentrate on a stronger self image.
- O: Offer it full partnership in your life.
- N: Never let it disappear; you must work to reinforce your sense of self.
- F: Fulfil yourself with your self image; it is your best friend.
- I: Infuse your self image with compassion when you meet setbacks.
- D: Develop it every day; only your true sense of self can make you strong.
- E: Elevate yourself with your self image so that you need not fear competition.
- N: Nourish it; don’t let a false sense of selflessness convince you that it is not basic to your happiness.
- C: Create a climate in which it can grow; spend time every day thinking, with humility, about yourself and your world.
- E: Enjoy it; continually reactivate the success instincts, the success mechanism, within you.
“Self-improvement without self-love is like building a house upon sand. You can build and build, but it will always sink” Vironika Tugaleva
Remember this: Only you, with the self confidence you build in yourself, in your mind, and which you carry with you into life, in your mind, can create giving relationships with people, productive relationships in the world of work and interests, which can make your years bubble with life.
Confidence implies forgiveness. You feel too big to be threatened, too self-reliant, too nimble at relaxing away emotional hurts. So you are able to forgive.
You forgive others with no strings attached, a clean slate, and no vestige of condemnation. A difficult task, but you can do it.
And you forgive yourself as you forgive others. For forgiveness is but another reflection of confidence, instant confidence.
As you go through the process of improving your self-image and increasing your self confidence, try to think of yourself as a separate person. Picture yourself as a stranger who is on a path toward positive change. Be sure to celebrate this person’s accomplishments.
“Whatever we expect with confidence becomes our own self-fulfilling prophecy” Brian Tracy